She’s attractive, friendly, and divorced. She’s the mother of a beautiful daughter and Nana to her three wonderful grandchildren. However, she never experienced a healthy, loving, committed relationship with a man she really loved until she was in her late fifties.
Why? What was wrong? Why didn’t she find her true love sooner? Was it her? Was it the men she dated? Was it the way she dated? It may have been her. She didn’t have a good parental example of what a healthy, loving relationship looked like. She had a father who didn’t know how to be affectionate or say I love you. Her father beat her mother, and being the oldest, it was her responsibility to run next door and call the police each time things got heated (no cell phones back then). Her mother finally left her father when she was fourteen.
Having no loving father example at home, she turned to other men for male approval. However, she found out quickly that men are very sexual beings, and many men want sex even when they don’t want a relationship. She eventually learned that just because a man wants to have sex is not a good reason to have sex with him.
When she was fifteen, she lost her virginity. It was the day she was raped by a friend: no love, no affection, no gentleness or caring, just trauma. At eighteen, she found herself pregnant and in a shotgun wedding. He cheated on her several times before she finally divorced him.
By now, you have probably guessed that I am the young woman in this story. You are right. Now, it wasn’t but a few years later, I was raped again.
No More Dating
In my early 20s, I came to the point where I was too frustrated and discouraged to date anymore. At that time, my self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth had dropped down past ground level and settled into a deep pit. It was so bad that I couldn’t even look men in the eye to talk to them. If I walked into a restaurant and men turned to look, my head would go down, and my eyes would look at the floor.
After six years of not dating, I realized all my single friends and family members were married. I really wanted to be married, but I was stuck in what I call the Knight in Shining Armor Syndrome. I was waiting for my Prince Charming to ride up on his beautiful white horse, knock on my door, and hand me flowers. He would help me up on his beautiful white horse and we would ride off to Happily Ever After!
Then I Came to My Senses
I knew deep down inside that to have an intimate relationship with someone, I would have to learn how to interact with men again as friends first. To start interacting with men again, I needed to knock down the walls I had put up to protect myself. What a dilemma!
My decision was to interview single men like a reporter. This way, I could learn about what they wanted in a woman, in a dating relationship, and in a marriage. Also, I could do it all in a way that I would not have to deal with the pressures of the dating scene. Boy, oh boy! What a challenge!
What a success! It was just what I needed. The men were wonderful, and I was surprised at their openness and desire to share their thoughts and feelings about women, love, sex, and dating. I interviewed literally hundreds of men. That was very exciting and extremely educating! I learned so much and developed some great friendships from that experience. I’m still interviewing to this day. Now, even though that was great, the best was yet to come.
This experience turned me on and pumped me up! I found my hot button and area of personal passion. My self-confidence came back, and I started a singles group at my church and then started working with hundreds of singles across the Tampa Bay area.
The more dating and relationship books I read and relationship seminars I attended, the more my fascination grew. A passion started growing in me to help singles, including myself, have better relationships. With increased confidence, I started dating again.
Over the years, I read hundreds of relationship books, many of which were written by Ph.D.’s, attended their seminars, took their courses, and traveled all over the country to attend their conferences. I listened to their CDs, webinars, and video series, even attending several marriage enrichment classes. I desired to learn all I could about healthy, loving relationships, which I didn’t experience as a child. Also, I desired to know how to handle relationship problems before they came up.
This led to my obsession with information gathering. It was like pouring water on a dry sponge. The next step was to pass out hundreds of questionnaires all over the Tampa Bay area. Those results got me on the local news and eventually my own radio program.
Part of this sequence covered a ten-year period where I dove into my work, becoming a workaholic. I worked mostly at reaching out to singles by hosting events. These events ranged from candlelight dinner banquets and semi-formal dances to moonlight prayer on the beach. We had anywhere from thirty singles to one hundred fifty in attendance.
During this period, I began holding seminars and workshops for single adults to share some of what I had learned. I wrote the Dating Pocket Guide and the Dating Differently books, set up an office, and hosted my local radio program called Integrity Singles. Later, singles started calling me a dating coach because I knew so much and was helping so many.
After writing my first published book on dating, I realized that all the books I knew of on the topic of dating, including mine, were people’s attempts to deal with the symptoms of some much deeper dating problems. For years, I looked but could not find any books, teachers, instructors, or singles leaders who were teaching the answers to these deeper core problems. So...
I Decided To Do It
I knew that to have success myself, I would have to find answers to those problems. I made a list of the problems and searched for answers for each of them. I also decided to come up with a different and better way to date. First, I went back in history to find what worked best. It was courtship. Then, I found a way to incorporate the good, healthy values and principles of courtship into today’s society and lifestyle. I knew this new process also had to accommodate most ages, races, and religious preferences.
It took over a decade to complete. But I knew I had something great when Jerry White walked me through the entire IntegrityDating process, and it very comfortably moved us from meeting to marriage! Yahoo! All the research, study, and practice finally came together in a process that works extremely well.
Many of my friends knew what I was working on and wanted the details. More and more people asked about it. So many people have asked how they can get the information that I decided the best and easiest way would be to put it in a course for everyone. Now, the IntegrityDating courses are available for you, your friends, family, children, and grandchildren.
My desire is to help singles and young adults learn about IntegrityDating and how to use it to meet quality people as well as lay a strong foundation for long-term love and marriage. I ask you to please join me by spreading the word about IntegrityDating. Please tell your friends and post it on all your social media sites.
My husband, Jerry White, my White Knight, dated me with this process (formerly called CourtshipDating), and we had an extremely enjoyable time. He told me to tell everyone that he said this process is Man Approved! During the process, he became convinced that all men and women should use the IntegrityDating process to develop a healthy, loving relationship with a strong, secure foundation to build upon. After nine years together, Jerry still says I have him bewitched and captivated. He certainly is my Hero, Prince Charming, and Knight in Shining Armor.
One of my personal challenges in finding the perfect man for me was to find a man who could handle a woman who talks a lot and one whose passion is talking about and teaching relationship stuff. Most men have a hard time with even small amounts of it. This is why I am thrilled with Jerry. He truly is someone who can handle the larger doses and loves me through it all. Ladies, if you are a talker like me, be encouraged. There are more men like Jerry out there.
Over the Years
As I said earlier, during my 40 years of dating I have been proposed to many times. I’m not saying this to be prideful, but to make a point. It simply proves that I have learned how to get a relationship to the place of commitment. It was a long road for me. Fortunately for you, there is a process that will help you find love faster and easier.
Congratulations! I am so excited for you!
I look forward to hearing from you and helping you find your Happily Ever After!
Get Excited! Your Reward is on Their Way!
Your Finding Love Mentor,
Christine Marie White
PS. I’d like to encourage you to complete all the courses in the Finding Love Success System starting with IntegrityDating. Use the others to help you to find love easier; use effective evaluating, attract your perfect partner, build your self-confidence, become a woman’s hero, become irresistible to men, lay a strong foundation for long-term success, and live happily ever after! And remember that your example while IntegrityDating will help others who are watching you. It will show your children, friends and family a better way.
To Those Who Are Not Single
I congratulate you for completing this course and encourage you to continue your learning. There is much more you can teach your children and others once you have educated yourself with the other courses.
As I said at the beginning of this course, we can’t allow the hook-up culture to take over our communities and our country. This is why I am starting the IntegrityDating movement.
We Must… Replace the Hook-up Culture
with an IntegrityDating Culture!
Please join us by spreading the word about IntegrityDating to your friends, family, on social media and wherever you can. I dream of the day that we will see schools, churches, government agencies, health department, Center for Disease Control, police, pregnancy centers, battered women’s shelters, and other clubs, groups and organizations promoting IntegrityDating. Thank you for your support! Together we can make America a better place.
Online courses: FindingLove.Academy
Email: [email protected]
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YouTube Channel: Finding Love Academy
The Expert Site: ChristineMarieWhite.LinktoExpert.com